Toxic Parents . . . The Antidotes

When you’re hurt by the people you love or those who God gave to LOVE YOU, nurture you, hold you and protect you, there is no greater pain then when they slash out with their weapon of “venom”. One can just find themselves torn inside out, as they’re scattered into tiny pieces.

We are living in an #imperfect world! None of us are made to perfection, but the scaring and hurt resulting from “toxic parents” becomes everlasting, as it’s molded into existence. Therefore, toxicity carves a deeper wound of imperfection into our being. Toxic parents can have an array of ammunition, as they aim with actions of physical, verbal and emotional abuse. To safeguard against “the abusers,” and their line of fire, here are a few techniques to use as #antidotes:

• Break ties with the toxic person
─ Realize that’s a bit harsh. But if not, one becomes infected by its poison
─ One’s health is more important, end the face-to-face contact
─ One may have to use baby steps. But find the courage to slowly walk away

• Avoid one on one contact
─ Meet in public arenas
─ Easier to escape drama by leaving

• Layout limitations of acceptance
─ Focus on what one can control
─ Should one elect to remain in the relationship, identify certain expectations
─This is where one can call all shots of what will be accepted and not accepted

• Analyze the dynamics
─ Helps to pinpoint when the sparks will fly; then can avoid the drama

• Distance self
─ Recognize/identify the triggers and remove self from the drama (e.g., controlling, combativeness, dismissive, self-absorbance,
batterer, addicts, etc.)
─ Give self some space stay away for specified amount of time
─ Limit contact/visits (May call on phone. That way can hang up when gets too harmful.)

• Be accepting
─ Parents engaging in toxic relationships are who they are. It is not in one’s power to change them
─ Create happiness for oneself while engaging in the acceptance process

• Reach out to others
─ Diminish the situation; obtain support from family members (e.g., siblings or relatives, etc.)

• Hold ground
─ Despite the negativity, remain firm in what one has chosen to do
─ Speak up and out; and remain positive
─ Positivity is bound to outweigh negativity

Certainly, there are other antidotes one can use to elevate interacting with those who swoosh out toxicants.
These were just for starters! One may have their own antidote. Whatever works . . . keep using it!

2 comments on “Toxic Parents . . . The Antidotes

  1. Yes, Nina, I agree to “avoid one on one contact”. We all have someone we love, who is toxic. I find it best to be around that person with other positive people in order to balance out the negative. We can’t change a person, but we can change our surroundings.
    Nina, your words have inspired me to be thankful for and appreciate the simple things in life that means so much! You are an “Amazing Writer” and such a Gem! Looking forward to reading your book!!
    Love you,
    Amela

    1. Amela,

      Yes, I feel the same way too. In our family tree, we all have someone who carries those toxins. It was a result of that factor which prompted me to write this message. Your shared thoughts is evidence that great minds think alike.
      Amela, I appreciate you stopping by and taking the time to read my blog(s). For this topic, it was good to know you found my words inspiring. And I’m glad I was able to reward you with an “Antidote.”

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